Do you ever lie awake wondering...what the hell has happened to my life? I've been doing that a lot lately. The big 3-0 is approaching fast and I am concerned that it's not going to be any better from this point on. Which is sad...because it rather sucks right now. I'm in a low paying job, and my limited education limits the opportunities out there. I'd love to go back to school, but paying all the bills makes it impossible to even afford to go part-time. I am unmarried and live alone (aside from my wacky avian friends) and it looks like it will be that way for quite a while. I just feel like there is not a lot out there to look forward to...that this is as good as it gets. (sigh) Well, enough self-pity. My friend Carolyn is supposed to be having a psychic over on Friday. I saw this gal a few months ago, but I wasn't sure what to think of her predictions. She told me I would be engaged by year's end, but not necessarily to my current partner and that there was a "secret admirer" waiting in the wings to sweep me off my feet. I also apparently have a "totem"-a big orange cat that watches over me(great, I'm being guarded by Garfield). It shall be interesting to see what her predicitons are this time and if they are consistent.