This kid blew my socks off...
3:45 PM
Hide in a hole and hibernate. But I guess that's not a realistic solution, is it?
This past month and a half have just been horrible. The cancellation of the wedding has hit me really hard, a lot harder than I am letting on to anyone around me. I shipped off my wedding dress and jewellery today that I managed to sell on Ebay..that was heartbreaking, I adored that dress. I remember posting the pictures of it on here and being so excited...I feel like all my enthusiasm and excitement has been sucked out of me like a deflated balloon.
I should have known...I really should have known. This was the first happy, exciting thing to happen in our lives for years...I'm talking years overshadowed by sadness and disappointment and heartbreak...so I should have known it was too good to be true. I kept trusting that things would get better, that my positivity could push us forward, that working together towards having a happy life would make it easier. I feel so foolish, so incredibly foolish. I am a pessimist at heart, but I was so optimistic about this one thing. I always say expect the worst so you won't be disappointed...I failed to heed my own advice on this one.
But we learn from our mistakes. We build walls, we become more guarded, less trusting. It's such a shame, but necessary to emotionally keep ourselves together...
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